My steady is a witch. Yes, you heard it right. My girlfriend, who I have been dating for the past six months, is a witch. Now, before you start conjuring up images of broomsticks and cauldrons, let me assure you that being a witch in today's world is quite different from what you might imagine. When I first found out about her true identity, I must admit I was taken aback. It was not something I was expecting, and it definitely caught me off guard.
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I m not going to shake my fist at the sky and announce to you all that this film is like an utter travesty and has ruined the legend it hasn t , but it definitely isn t good by any means. I just got a bit to bored to care like a lot of these Found Footage films but I still keep watching for tje diamond in the rough as Found Footage watchers do.
It was not something I was expecting, and it definitely caught me off guard. But as I got to know her better, I realized that being a witch was not something to be feared or stereotyped. In fact, it was just another part of who she is.
THE BELL WITCH HAUNTING (2013)
Studio: The Asylum
Director: Glenn Miller
Writer: Glenn Miller
Producer: Paul Bales, David Michael Latt, David Rimawi
Stars: Andrew Hellenthal, Catherine Alter, Benjamin James, James Simenc, Desi Isanova, Danielle Lozaeu, Jason Kakebeen
Review Score :
Summary:
The Sawyer family is plagued by the ghost of the Bell Witch when they move into a haunted house in Adams, Tennessee.
Synopsis: Show/Hide SpoilersJanuary 15th, 2011 – Officer Bungalon discovers the bodies of Scott Johnson and Lynn Roebuck along a rural road in Adams, Tennessee.
6 Hours Earlier – Brandon Sawyer celebrates his birthday at an outdoor pool party with his friend Chris and his cousin Colby. Brandon’s parents Michael and Jeanette give him a video camera as a gift. Brandon’s sister Dana brings her friends Kristi and Jessica to the party. The power goes out during the party. Lynn goes into a trance before Scott decides to take her home.
January 16th, 2011 – Day 2 – Brandon jumps out of his sister’s closet while she records her web series, “Dressing with Dana.”
January 17th, 2011 – Day 3 – While Brandon is out of his room, the camera records a door opening and things moving by themselves. That night, Dana is awoken by night terrors.
January 18th, 2011 – Day 4 – Nothing happens.
January 19th, 2011 – Day 5 – Brandon and Colby explore the woods. They find a dead animal that looks like it is half-rabbit and half-dog. Kristi records a female apparition while the girls have fun in Dana’s bedroom. Brandon hears scratching at his door while he tries to sleep. He also sees an apparition briefly while exploring the kitchen in the dark.
January 20th, 2011 – Day 6 – Brandon finds footprints leading from a puddle in the basement. While the girls are in Dana’s bedroom, a voice over the stereo says, “get out!” Kristi immediately leaves the Sawyer house in fear. Officer Bungalon later finds her body hanging from a tree.
January 21st, 2011 – Day 7 – Dana and Jessica discuss Kristi’s death. Dana has night terrors again.
January 22nd, 2011 – Day 8 – Jeanette hears something and falls in the basement. Michael cuts his hand while feeling for the source of the noise. Brandon and his mother discover that Dana’s face is mysteriously scratched out of all the family photos. Michael is covered with a strange red slime while working at the kitchen sink.
January 23rd, 2011 – Day 9 – Colby and Brandon research the legend of the Bell Witch and discover that the Sawyer house is built on the same land from the nineteenth century haunting. Based on the bizarre occurrences in the house, the two boys then set up surveillance cameras throughout the home. A living room lamp turns on by itself. While Kristi and Dana sleep in a bed together, their bed sheet rises in the air before returning to the bed and attempting to suffocate the girls. Kristi leaves.
January 24th, 2011 – Day 10 – Jeanette cuts her hand while fiddling with the living room lamp. While filming an episode for his web series “Get Electric with Denny,” an electrician working on the house is electrocuted.
January 25th, 2011 – Night 11 – The witch appears on the surveillance cameras before Dana has another night terror.
January 26th, 2011 – Day 12 – Brandon and Colby review the footage and decide to examine the nearby woods while looking for the Bell Witch cave. Brandon’s mother calls him away before the boys can leave. Colby investigates alone and is attacked by something unseen. Brandon and his father later search the forest for Colby and find his body with its innards torn out.
January 27th, 2011 – Day 13 – While filming a tribute to Colby at Wood Creek, Chris is attacked and killed by the witch.
January 27th, 2011 – Night 13 – Michael sleepwalks outside in a trance. He goes into convulsions as a fire burns in the outside fireplace. Jeanette calls 911 when she finds her husband’s blood all over the bathroom sink. Officer Bungalon eventually finds Michael wandering a dark road and screaming, “get out of my house!” Back at home, Michael spits up red slime.
Dana becomes trapped in the basement. Jeanette calls 911 when she is unable to find her daughter. Officer Bungalon later finds Dana in a drainage pipe eating a raccoon and returns her to the Sawyer residence. Michael becomes enraged when his wife suggests leaving the house.
January 28th, 2011 – Day 14 – Pots and pans fall over in the kitchen. Jeanette contacts a priest.
January 29th, 2011 – Night 15 – The priest performs an exorcism on Dana. In her possessed state, Dana kills him. The family follows Dana into the woods. Brandon is attacked by his sister. She uses the camera to kill him. Michael fires his gun at Dana but instead shoots his wife. Dana then forces her father to turn the gun on himself. No longer possessed, Dana comes to her senses and sees the carnage. She follows an apparition into a nearby cave and comes face to face with the witch. Epilogue text reveals that Dana currently lives in a privately owned asylum on the east coast and still suffers from night terrors.
Review:
Not to be confused with a 2004 movie bearing the same name, 2013’s “The Bell Witch Haunting” is a “found footage” horror film that hitches its wagon to the real-life legend of a Tennessee ghost that plagued farmer John Bell and his family in the nineteenth century. With a title that resembles that of the “found footage” poster child it tries to emulate, “The Bell Witch Haunting” is also a highlight reel of every reason why critics lament the absence of innovation in the sub-genre.
Urban folklore has it that the ghost of a witch named Kate Batts haunted the Bell family’s farmland property in 1817. Unbeknownst to the Sawyer family of “The Bell Witch Haunting,” they relocate to a house on that same Adams, Tennessee land in 2011 and strange events start taking place in their home.
The strange events begin at a birthday party for young Brandon Sawyer. Despite the average temperature for Tennessee in January being somewhere in the neighborhood of 45 degrees, the celebration takes place at an outdoor poolside barbecue. The Sawyers must live in an unseasonably warm area of Adams anyway, as they even have palm trees adjacent to the nearby woods. Plus the fair weather gives several high school girls an inexplicable opportunity to take off their bikini tops at a family affair populated by more middle-aged parents than by teenagers.
My girlfriend is a modern witch, practicing the craft in a way that is aligned with nature and focused on personal growth and spirituality. She does not cast spells to harm others or manipulate situations. Instead, she uses her knowledge and connection with nature to bring positivity and healing into her life and the lives of those around her. One of the things I admire most about her is her strong sense of self and her ability to embrace her uniqueness. Not many people have the courage to openly identify as a witch in a world that can be judgmental and dismissive. But she does, and it is inspiring. Being in a relationship with a witch has opened my eyes to a whole new world of spirituality and self-discovery. It has taught me the importance of embracing our true selves and connecting with nature. Together, we explore different rituals and practices that bring us closer to our authentic selves and enhance our understanding of the world around us. Of course, there are challenges too. Misconceptions and stereotypes can make it difficult for others to accept our relationship. But we choose to focus on love and acceptance instead of judgment and negativity. In conclusion, my steady being a witch is not something that defines our relationship, but rather adds depth and richness to it. It is a reminder to embrace our true selves and be open to different perspectives and beliefs. Being with her has taught me the importance of respect and understanding, and I am grateful for the opportunity to learn and grow together..
Reviews for "My Steady's Witchcraft Workshop: Experiencing the Magic of Love"
1. Sarah - 1 star
I was really disappointed with "My Steady is a Witch". The storyline was slow and predictable, and the characters lacked depth. The jokes fell flat and the attempts at humor felt forced. Overall, I found the book to be dull and unoriginal, and I would not recommend it to others.
2. John - 2 stars
I had high hopes for "My Steady is a Witch" but unfortunately, it fell short of my expectations. The plot was confusing and disjointed, and the pacing was all over the place. The main character lacked charisma and I couldn't connect with their struggles. The romantic elements felt contrived and forced, and the overall writing style was lackluster. I wanted to like this book, but it just didn't resonate with me.
3. Emma - 2 stars
I couldn't get into "My Steady is a Witch" at all. The premise seemed promising but the execution was lacking. The dialogue felt stilted and unnatural, making it difficult to invest in the characters and their relationships. The world-building was also underdeveloped, leaving many unanswered questions. I also found the ending to be unsatisfying and rushed. Overall, this book didn't hold my attention and I was left wanting more substance.