Magic Years is a book written by Selma H. Fraiberg, a renowned child psychologist. The book explores the critical stages of a child's development from birth to age five, also known as the "magic years." Fraiberg delves into the emotional and psychological development of children during this period. She emphasizes the importance of these early years in shaping a child's overall well-being and future. The book explores various topics such as attachment, emotional development, language acquisition, cognitive skills, and understanding the child's changing needs.

The Magic of Play: How It Inspires & Aids Early Development

With the help of a frilly dress, tiara, and magic wand, your 3-year-old becomes the queen of a magical universe and rides a winged unicorn. When you're asked to taste the pink clouds, you agree that they're a lot like bubblegum.

Your 4-year-old pulls a sheet over his shoulders and runs as fast as he can across the lawn. He's a superhero, out to save the backyard from dragons hiding behind the bushes and find treasure buried in the sandbox.

Parents of preschoolers have a front-row seat to some of the most imaginative theater ever made. These are the "magic years" — when kids imagine grand stories and don’t ask, "But can that really happen?"

Here's why imagination is so important and what you can do to foster these magic years.

How Preschoolers View the World

There's a lot that very young children can’t yet grasp about the world around them. So they "fill in the blanks" and often make up their own magical explanations for how things work.

This time, which peaks during the preschool years, was dubbed "the magic years" by child development expert Selma Fraiberg.

Babies use their senses (touch, taste, smell, sight, and sound) to explore their world. As they develop, they begin to understand how things work ("If I push this button, the pony will pop out of the barn!").

Now, as preschoolers, they take this knowledge and combine it with a growing imagination to come up with fantastical ideas about why and how things happen.

Pretend play lets kids try out new roles for themselves (like superheroes, princesses, dinosaurs, wild animals, or even parents) and allows for creative problem-solving. But it also helps them deal with another hurdle of the preschool years: intense emotions. Baby dolls might be put in "time out" and scolded for actions suspiciously similar to your little one's latest offense. An imaginary friend (who's a bigger troublemaker than your child ever could be) might be dreamed up to help your child deal with feelings of guilt and remorse following a moment of lost control, such as hitting a playmate.

Self-control is a tough skill to learn, and pretend play helps kids practice it as well as play out the frustration it creates.

How Can I Encourage Imaginative Play?

Imaginative play begins in a child's mind. But that doesn't mean parents can't join in. Here are some ways to encourage your child's world of make-believe:

• Go along with it. When young ones leap through the air and tell you they're flying, don't tell them they're only jumping. Instead, feed the fantasy: "Wow, you're so high up! What can you see on the ground? Maybe you should take a rest on that nice puffy cloud." Or even better, start flying with them.
• Choose old-fashioned toys. Blocks, dolls, arts and crafts, and molding clay are all toys that require creativity and therefore spur imagination.
• Limit electronic toys. Whether it's a handheld entertainment system or a "junior" laptop, try to avoid toys that need batteries. Creativity is stifled when the toy, rather than the child, directs the play.
• Readto your child. And while reading, ask mind-opening questions: "If you were the caterpillar, what would you eat?" and "What do you think will happen next in the story?" This not only encourages imagination but promotes language skills and fosters an interest in books.
• Schedule downtime. Make sure kids have free time every day to play on their own. Aside from encouraging creativity, it teaches them to use their own resources to amuse or soothe themselves.
• Limit screen time. When kids watch a movie or even an educational program, they experience someone else's make-believe world instead of using their own imaginations. Young kids also are influenced by ads because they can't tell the difference between commercials and actual programs. The same goes for digital ads in online games and apps. Limit screen time (which includes TV, DVDs, computers, smartphones, and tablets) to no more than 1 hour of quality programming per day for kids 2 to 5 years old. When your child does use a screen, take time to watch together.

When the Magic Ends

The day will come when the princess tiaras collect dust and your little ones no longer believe they can fly. It's a bittersweet moment. You'll miss glimpses into that world where anything is possible. But it's a sign that your child is growing up.

The prefrontal cortex — the area of the brain just behind the forehead — has made the connections it needs to process more high-level thinking. So, the way a child thought the world worked is now not necessarily how it actually does work.

Take, for example, vacuum cleaners. A 2-year-old might fear that, just as the dog hair got sucked up off the carpet, he will too. But a year or two later, he might pretend he's being chased by the vacuum "monster" — and gain confidence from knowing that it will never get him.

By age 6 or so, kids are becoming aware that fears like being swallowed up by a vacuum are irrational — there's no way your entire body can be sucked up that little tube and vacuum cleaners are not monsters! Instead, they might want to take control and do the vacuuming on their own. This scenario will be repeated again and again as a child learns to tell the difference between the possible and the impossible.

This is also a time when your fantastical answers to their increasingly complex questions will no longer cut it. Thunder can no longer be a bowling match in the sky and the moon definitely isn't made of cheese. But even though your kids don’t believe these tall tales anymore, it doesn't mean they can't imagine a bowling match in the sky or a moon made of cheese — it just means that now they'll be in on the joke.

The Magic Years: Understanding & Handling the Problems of Early Childhood

A pioneering work on early childhood development that is as relevant today as when it was first published 60 years ago.

To a small child, the world is an exciting but sometimes frightening and unstable place. In The Magic Years, Selma Fraiberg takes the reader into the mind of the child, showing how he confronts the world and learns to cope with it. With great warmth and perception, she discusses the problems at each stage of development and reveals the qualities—above all, the quality of understanding—that can provide the right answer at critical moments.

Genres ParentingPsychologyNonfictionEducationChildrensPsychiatryFamily

320 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1959

About the author

Selma H. Fraiberg

Selma Fraiberg (1918–1981) was a child psychoanalyst, author and social worker. She studied infants with congenital blindness in the 1970s. She found that blind babies had three problems to overcome: learning to recognize parents from sound alone, learning about permanence of objects, acquiring a typical or healthy self image. She also found that vision acts as a way of pulling other sensory modalities together and with out sight babies are delayed. In addition to her work with blind babies, she also was one of the founders of the field of infant mental health and developed mental health treatment apporaches for infants, toddlers and their families.

The book explores various topics such as attachment, emotional development, language acquisition, cognitive skills, and understanding the child's changing needs. Fraiberg highlights the significance of the parent-child relationship during the magic years and provides valuable insights into how parents can enhance their child's development through nurturing and responsive caregiving. She emphasizes the importance of understanding a child's unique personality and needs and guides parents on how to promote healthy growth and development.

Ratings & Reviews

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I read this book again now that I am a grandparent after first reading it about 28 years ago when I was a pre-school teacher. I greatly enjoyed it and find that so many of Fraiberg's examples still ring true and her good sense approach is still very refreshing and valuable. But it is very dated in it's psychoanalytical perspective and it's language about sexual identity. I felt that her discussion of the challenges that boys face was still quite relevant, while her discussion of girls sexual identification made me cringe. In the first two pages of the section "on being a girl", I count 20 uses of the words "feminine" and "femininity".

At any rate, I'm passing it on to my son who is now a Papa of a baby girl and I trust he will be able to translate for his modern day sensibilities.

A magnificent book. I finished "The Magic Years" several months ago for the second time. It was a required “text” in a course that I took at Manhattan College, many years ago. It’s message is just as fresh and enlightening now as I remember it being then!

To a small child, the world is an exciting but sometimes frightening and unstable place. The point of this book, Selma Fraiberg says, is that “A method of child-rearing is not – or should not be – a whim, a fashion or a shibboleth. It should derive from an understanding of the developing child, of his physical and mental equipment at any given stage and, therefore, his readiness at any given stage to adapt, to learn, to regulate his behavior according to parental expectations.”

The primary subject matter of the book is divided into three parts – the first eighteen months, eighteen months to three years, and three years to six. The author takes the reader into the mind of the child, showing how he/she confronts this world and learns to cope with it. She discusses the problems at each stage of development and reveals the qualities – above all, the quality of understanding – that can provide the right answers at critical moments. In describing, how children mature from birth to six years old, she discusses theories and facts about feeding, talking, sex education, fantasy, self-control, fear, and other subjects in practical terms of daily living. One of the most interesting parts of the book was the section, in Chapter 5, on the building of a conscience.

Her style is literate and graceful. I think that The Magic Years should be required reading (a classic, still in print after more than 50 years since it was first published) for all social scientists and parents-to-be. I’ve given it as a Christmas gift to several such couples this past year.

One of my favorite books on early childhood. Not really a "how to" about handling problems so much as a philosophy and understanding of childhood development. A classic! First read in my child psych training.

Įdomi knyga. Tik jai skaityti ir suprasti man reikėjo susikaupti. Pristatoma vaiko raida ir sunkumai iš psichoanalitinio požiūrio taško. Manau, įkandama ne kiekvienam.

I reccomend this book even before actually becoming parents. If you are planning pregnancy - I encourage you to add it in your reading list. I have read it when I was already raising a 4 year old, so it was a pity for me to realize so many things after the fact. It is a game changer in understanding why your kid is acting in some ways and it becomes easier to accept the behaviours and become a better parent. It gives explanations to the child’s behaviours in a scientific way of physical development and even the improvement of baby’s sight could be a reason why they cry in the hands of people who were previously easily accepted by them.

There are some serious problems with the age of this book and the racist and chauvinist examples it gives. At one point when describing Abraham Lincoln as a hero, she says something like, "although he didn't kill bears or Indians". I mean, seriously, there needs to be a deep edit for the times. I understand this was written in 1959 but the copy I read was reprinted in 2008. This cannot stand. Other issues I had were the use of family examples only using traditional nuclear families and implications that other types of families couldn't raise healthy, well developed children. Not to mention a whole section using a missionary/residential school approach as a positive example. Additionally, there were descriptions of ideal characteristics of gender that were inappropriate for 2021.

That being clear, parts of it were useful to me. I did enjoy the description of what "magic" is to young children (less about magic and more about them not having a full grasp on the way the world works), anxiety and fear and morality.

Unless this book comes out with a new edition that is heavily revised, I would give it a pass.

I read this very differently than when I first had to read Fraiberg for child psychotherapy studies. Less outraged and more curious about the possibilities of psychoanalysis. It's lovely to vicariously delight in the external world through the wondrous internal world of young people. It's very difficult though, to get past the cringefully outdated gendered frameworks of infantile sexuality, and gross colonialist metaphors of parenting as missionary work to civilize the savage. I'm desperate for an update on theories of ego development that aren't so binary in terms of gender. And some cultural considerations too please while you're at it.

1 book 20 followers

I thought this book was very helpful. The only thing that really bothered me was the first sentence of the introduction to the 50th Anniversary edition in which T. Berry Brazelton said that The Magic Years had been around for a half decade. Oops.

The best passages to understand your childhood years.
This is the best book I have ever read about chikdren psychology indeed. I advise every father and mother to read it, and for those who wants to be parents also.

Když vynecháme úvod a závěr, je to docela čtivá a zajímavá kniha o náhledu dětí na svět, jejich vývoji a roli, jakou při výchově hrají rodiče.
Text je rozdělen do tří částí podle věku dítěte (miminka, do tří let, do šesti let). To je taky taky jediný typ úpravy v celé knize. Ocenila bych trochu přehlednější formátování: seznamy a postupy v odrážkách, příklady z praxe kurzívou, tabulky. takhle je jen jednolitý text, sotva rozdělen na odstavce.
Dál jsem velmi postrádala citace výzkumů, na které se autorka odkazuje. Nevím, jestli je to "stářím" knihy, ale několik informací, které autorka prezentuje jako dané a dokázané jsou dnes vědecky prokazatelně jinak (např. že dítě nezná po porodu matku, nutnost zasloužit si lásku rodičů. ).
Celkově je kniha postavena na docela nekontaktních základech (dudlík, separace, postýlka, kaše a láhve.. ). Občas až paradoxně. Jak chcete dítěti zabránit být u toho, když se rodič obléká, sprchuje, jde na WC? Jo vlastně, dát ho do postýlky, zavřít za ním dveře a nechat ho řvát.
Jednotlivá témata jsou spolu často spojena šílenými oslími můstky. A některé příklady z praxe, které mají zřejmě ilustrovat právě probírané téma, ukazují pravý opak. Nejzřetelnější to je v části o trestu a logických důsledcích.

Po vší té kritice to možná bude znít divně, ale v knize se nachází mnoho podnětných myšlenek, návodů a úžasných příkladů. V celém textu se prolíná důležitost lásky a přítomnosti mateřské osoby při vývoji dítěte. Uvedené příklady jsou popsány zábavně a velmi věrně. A kapitola o sexuální výchově mi taky přišla rozumná a docela pokroková.
Záblesky "alternativního" stylu výchovy byly osvěžující: " Příliš velká rebélie je reakcí na příliš velký tlak." a " Ve válečném stavu je výuka zablokována."
Autorka také podporuje prožití pocitů a neodvádění pozornosti při problematických situacích.

Celkově hodnotím knihu kladně. Určitě stojí zato si ji přečíst a možná se k ní i vrátit, jak dítě poroste. Magický svět, do kterého se dítě narodí je zde popsán fantasticky. Až mě občas mrzelo, že z této fáze jsem už vyrostla.

More academic and harder to read than most other parenting books, but The Magic Years offers an insightful look into the child's mind in the years of early childhood. At times the writing is unnecessarily wordy and not as user friendly as most other books geared towards childcare. However, it is a fascinating read for anyone interested in learning more about child development. Understanding the child's mind and journey towards developing individuality and personality is useful information for reacting to and dealing with potentially difficult behavior. Many parenting books are typically not always suitable for people who, like me, work in childcare, as they often contain a lot of technical information that I find unnecessary to know as someone who is not a full time parent. However, I found this to be a worthwhile one.

The Magic Years

The Magic Years book also addresses various challenges that parents may encounter during this period, such as tantrums, separation anxiety, and the emergence of independence. Fraiberg offers practical tips and strategies to navigate these challenges effectively and promote a positive parent-child relationship. Throughout the book, Fraiberg draws from her extensive clinical experience and research to provide a comprehensive understanding of early childhood development. She presents her insights in a clear and accessible manner, making it an invaluable resource for parents, educators, and professionals working with young children. In summary, Magic Years is a thought-provoking and informative book that highlights the crucial importance of the early years in a child's life. It offers practical guidance and strategies for parents to nurture their child's growth and development during this formative period. Fraiberg's expertise and compassionate approach make this book a must-read for anyone interested in understanding and supporting young children..

Reviews for "Reading Aloud: Connecting with Children in the Magic Years through Books"

1. Sarah - ★☆☆☆☆

I really wanted to like the "Magic Years" book, but unfortunately, it fell short of my expectations. The content seemed repetitive and basic, lacking any real depth or insights. I was hoping for practical advice or innovative ideas, but instead, I found generic information that I already knew. Overall, I was quite disappointed and would not recommend this book to anyone looking for a comprehensive and engaging guide to child development.

2. John - ★★☆☆☆

While "Magic Years" does cover some important aspects of child development, I found it to be overly simplistic and lacking in substance. The author's writing style became monotonous and uninteresting after a while, making it difficult to stay engaged. Additionally, I was hoping for a more research-based approach, but instead, the book seemed to rely heavily on personal anecdotes. Overall, I think there are much better resources available for parents seeking a more nuanced understanding of their child's early years.

3. Emily - ★★☆☆☆

I was highly disappointed by the "Magic Years" book. The author seemed to make sweeping generalizations about child development without providing any evidence or research to back up their claims. This left me feeling skeptical and wanting more reliable information. Furthermore, the book lacked practical tips or actionable strategies, which I was hoping to find. Overall, I found it to be a shallow overview of child development and would not recommend it to fellow parents seeking a more comprehensive and evidence-based resource.

4. Alex - ★☆☆☆☆

After reading the "Magic Years" book, I couldn't help but feel like I wasted my time. The content was filled with clichés and common sense advice that any parent would already know. There was nothing groundbreaking or thought-provoking about this book. It felt more like a collection of fluff pieces rather than a valuable resource for understanding child psychology. I would advise parents to look elsewhere for a more informative and useful book on early childhood development.

The Science of Storytelling: How Books Shape Brain Development in the Magic Years